Best “Trek” of them all? How could it be anything but the classic? I’ll admit – there’s a bit less cheez in TNG and DS9, or at least a more modern flavor of cheez…but no matter how you break it down, no matter how much I love Picard, Crusher and Data, no matter how much I enjoy Sisko, Dax and Odo, there’s just no topping Kirk, Bones and Spock.
As with TNG, it’s hard to narrow a list down to just five choices when there are so many great episodes. Some that didn’t quite make the list: “The City on the Edge of Forever” (much like TNG’s “The Inner Light,” it’s a great episode, but not, in my opinion, “the greatest” episode), “Bread and Circuses” (the best “parallel Earth” episode), “The Tholian Web,” “Arena,” “Balance of Terror,” “The Enterprise Incident”.
And here’s the Top Five Original Series Episodes:
Turns out that Orion animal women were far from Kirk's strangest vice...
5. A Private Little War: It is an indisputable fact that “Star Trek,” TOS moreso than any of the other series, did not generally deal in subtlety. While not quite so anvilicious as others (“Lokai is white on the right side. All of his people are white on the right side!”), “A Private Little War” is certainly not disguising its allegory. They’re right up front about it, in fact, as Kirk and McCoy specifically discuss “the brush wars in Asia in the 20th century” and how they apply to their current situation. Still, the moral dilemma Kirk is faced with is thoroughly compelling. The Soviets Klingons have started arming one tribe on a primitive planet with flintlock rifles, and Kirk is forced to decide whether to arm the other side and virtually guarantee a never-ending arms race between the two sides, or do nothing and allow his friend’s tribe to be wiped out. This episode serves as a terrific example of McCoy’s usual role as Kirk’s conscience. Bones is appalled that Kirk is even considering the matter and, with his usual bluntness, tells Kirk so in non uncertain terms. In the end, Kirk goes against McCoy’s advice and orders Scotty to create and beam down 100 rifles. Kirk is disgusted with himself, and departs for the ship. Wisely, the creators leave the ultimate results of Kirk’s decision to the viewers’ imaginations.
"Wow, Spock, I didn't even believe you when you said you could eat fitty egg...but this is beyond the pale!"
4. The Devil in the Dark: Or, “‘Star Trek’ does a ’50s Sci-Fi Monster Movie.” The Enterprise crew pursues a mysterious creature that’s killing the crew of an important mining colony. It’s really reminiscent of stuff like Forbidden Planet and The Thing from Another World – the nature of the monster is at first mysterious, then slowly the origin and intent of the creature becomes clear. Amazingly, the Red Shirt body count is pretty low in this episode – only two Red Shirts plus one miner are killed. Yeah, the horta looks kind of silly by today’s standards, and Spock’s mind meld with it is a bit over-the-top. But when you’re earning praise from no less than Arthur C. Clarke (“It impressed me because it presented the idea, unusual in science fiction then and now, that something weird, and even dangerous, need not be malevolent. That is a lesson that many of today’s politicians have yet to learn.”), you’re obviously doing something right.
William Shatner goes hairpiece shopping.
3. The Trouble With Tribbles: What’s to say about this episode that hasn’t already been said? Playing “Star Trek” as comedy is a brilliant idea, and the whole thing is an awful lot of fun. Shatner chews the scenery like a madman (my personal favorite: “Storagecompartments?Storagecompartments? Whaaat…..storage…compartments?”), and Scotty’s role in the bar brawl is hilarious as well. James Doohan has a lot of fun with Scotty’s patience as the Klingon is insulting Kirk, but then can’t take it when the Enterprise is compared to a garbage scow, and then once more as he sheepishly relates the incident to Kirk later on. There’s really not much to say about it, other than the fact that it lives up to its reputation.
"I said, 'Smiles, everyone!' You're not smiling!"
2. Space Seed: For a starship captain noted for his intelligence and quick wits, James T. Kirk can do some pretty damn stupid things. You come across a ship full of people in suspended animation called the SS Botany Bay, sent away from Earth with no discernable destination in pre-warp days…and you think, “Well, hey, whaddaya say we wake these folks up?” Do they not teach history at Starfleet Academy? Regardless of this bit of silliness, this is a tremendous episode. Khan is a truly worthy adversary for Kirk – stronger, certainly, and quite possibly smarter. It’s really a great character moment for Kirk when he goes to engage Khan in hand-to-hand combat. It’s an almost certain defeat, as Kirk is obviously and hopelesly outmatched by Khan – and yet he goes anyway, and in typical Kirk fashion, finds a way to win against all odds.
In millions upon millions of gigs of awful slashfic, Spock goes right aheand and plants one on Kirk at this moment.
1. Amok Time: Over its three seasons, and again throughout the movies, “Star Trek” got a lot of mileage out of Spock’s dual human/Vulcan heritage, but never better than in this episode. The moment at the episode’s end when Spock discovers that he has not, as he previously believed, killed Kirk is simply perfect. He breaks into an enormous grin, grabs Kirk by the shoulders and shouts, “Jim!” It’s a perfect moment from Leonard Nimoy, letting his guard down for the tiniest fraction of a second before realizing what he’s doing and regaining his composure. It is, however, just one perfect moment out of many in this episode. The early mystery of Spock’s behavior, Kirk’s choice of the health and safety of his friend over his own career (presaging the similar choice he would make in The Search for Spock, of course), the truly awesome fight between Kirk and Spock, Spock’s recognition of T’Pring’s logic in choosing another mate and his resignation to his fate after killing his captain…and, of course, one of Spock’s best lines ever: “After a time, you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true.”
—
Special Bonus Top Five: Top Five TOS Episodes That Are Supremely Goofy but Secretly Totally Awesome:
5. “Let That Be Your Last Battlefield” – Racism is bad, y’all!
4. “The Savage Curtain” – Kirk and Spock and Abraham Lincoln and Vulcan Jesus vs. some Klingons and Klingon Jesus.
3. “Spectre of the Gun” – Kirk & Co. in the Old West, gunfighting at the OK Corral. Somehow, less stupid than the TNG “Old West” episode.
2. “Wink of an Eye” – Kirk kisses the girl. Commercial. When we come back, Kirk is sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling on his boot. Remember that “lack of subtlety” issue?
1. “The Way to Eden” – C’mon, admit it: Space hippies are totally groovy, and we all know it.
–
And there you have it. Check back in tomorrow as we wrap up Star Trek Week with the main event: my review of the big movie. Sneak preview: It does not suck.
Filed under: star trek week, top five | Tagged: star trek week, top five
